Funny Morning Coffee Quotes

Funny Morning Coffee Quotes by Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr., Ronald Reagan, Jim Carrey, Lewis Black, Alphonse Allais, David Letterman and many others.

The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it

The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce.
Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.
Ronald Reagan
I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, ‘Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.’
Jim Carrey
I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.
Lewis Black
Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
Alphonse Allais
Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.
David Letterman
Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.
Earl Wilson
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
Steven Wright
Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it’s hard to go back to sleep.
Fran Drescher
Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, ‘Jesus! This cup is expensive!’
Conan O’Brien
It seems to me that trying to live without friends is like milking a bear to get cream for your morning coffee. It is a whole lot of trouble, and then not worth much after you get it.
Zora Neale Hurston
He was my cream, and I was his coffee – And when you poured us together, it was something.
Josephine Baker
A cup of coffee – real coffee – home-browned, home ground, home made, that comes to you dark as a hazel-eye, but changes to a golden bronze as you temper it with cream that never cheated, but was real cream from its birth, thick, tenderly yellow, perfect!
Henry Ward Beecher
Black as the devil, hot as hell, pure as an angel, sweet as love.
Charles Maurice de Talleyrand
Coffee in England is just toasted milk.
Christopher Fry
Do you know how many calories are in butter and cheese and ice cream? Would you get your dog up in the morning for a cup of coffee and a donut?
Jack LaLanne
Without my morning coffee I’m just like a dried up piece of roast goat.
Johann Sebastian Bach